


Dean in Black

by vrskaandrea



Category: Men in Black (Movies), Supernatural
Genre: Body Swap, Case Fic, Sam as an African American, The Impala (Supernatural)
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-31
Updated: 2019-06-16
Packaged: 2020-04-05 06:36:46
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 9
Words: 9,855
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/19043149
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/vrskaandrea/pseuds/vrskaandrea
Summary: After yet another hunt, it is time to rest. But there is no rest for the Winchesters. Dean finds himself in a movie, where the creatures are different than what he knew. Was this a work of a witch, or a ghost? Perhaps even Gabriel? Or was it something completely different? A little bit of crack and a lot of confusion.This was one of my first fics, written a while back, so be gentle.





	1. Chapter 1

Sam and Dean walk into their motel room. They have just successfully completed another hunt, killing another witch.

Dean says "Man, I am tired."

Sam replies "Me too. Let's get to bed and head out first thing in the morning."

Dean nods and jumps in bed. He turns on the TV and starts flipping through the channels. Sam sighs "Dude, I thought you were tired."

"Just gonna see what's on."

Sam shakes his head and lays in bed. He was too tired, and dozed off right away.

Dean looks over at him, smiling. Then he focuses on the TV again. He kept flipping the channels, nothing interesting was on. Eventually he stopped at a movie.

"Mysteries in history, with your host Peter Graves. – an elderly man comes on –Although nobody was ever able to prove their existence, a quasi government agency called the Men in Black, supposedly carries out secret operations here on Earth in order to keep us safe from aliens throughout the galaxy."

Dean smiles. Aliens.Right.

"1978 the leaders of Zartha leave their planet in order to escape the clutches of the evil Kyloatian Selena. – TV shows a creature made entirely of something that looked like snakes – Arriving on Earth, the Zarthains bring their greatest treasure – the light of Zartha, a cosmic force so powerful that in the wrong hands it could lead to annihilation of Zartha. The Zarthain princess Lorana – Dean starts drawling seeing the actress on screen – asks the Men in Black to hide the light from Selina. But they had no choice. An intervention would've meant the destruction of Earth. "

Dean yawns as a spaceship lands where Lorana was meeting the Men in Black and the speaker went on "However, in an act of galactic bravery, the Men in Black subdued Selena, allowing the Zarthains to escape so that they might hide the light on another planet. Selena escaped her captors and swore she would find the light and destroy any planet that stood in her way. "

Dean's eyes grew heavier. "And so, never knowing what happened, the people of Earth were once again saved by a secret society of protectors known as the Men in Black... "

As the picture of the speaker on the TV fades into a night sky filled with stars, Dean slowly closes his eyes and drifts away.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~`

Sam and Dean were in deep sleep when a bright flickering light comes out of the TV. Sam mutters something and rolls over in the bed. The flickering lights wake Dean up. Still half asleep he stares at the TV wondering What the hell? And then everything goes dark.

Dean wakes up on the ground feeling like he was electrocuted. His hair a mess, standing up and smoke coming from his ears. He hears someone saying "Perfect."

A funny looking guy with a black strange haircut, big nose and eyes that look in different directions leans over him. Dean felt a gun in his hand. He pulls it up and shoots the guy in the head.

But this wasn't just a gun. Dean frowns looking at it. It was small and silver and had a needle at the end of the barrel. And it didn't fire bullets. "Lasers?" Dean wonders.

Then he sees Sam leaning over him. He smiles at him "You're back?"

"Back from where?" Dean asks confused.

"You still don't remember?" Sam asked. Dean shakes his head.

Sam frowns "Then how did you know his head would grow back?"

"It grows back?" Dean asked making a WTF face. He gets up, wobbling. Sam asks "K, you really don't remember?"

"K? What?" and then he notices. He was wearing a black suit and a tie. And so was Sam. Holly Crap. He goes through his jacket pockets and finds a shiny silver stick and a pair of black glasses.

"Son of a bitch!"

The guys head grows back saying "That's the last time I help out a friend." Sam turns to him and says "Why didn't it work?"

"I never got the updated software. His brain needs to reboot. Give it a minute."

Dean frowns at this. He starts looking around, realizing he's in a basement. He sees stairs and starts going up and entering a store of some sorts. Eventually he made it out in the street and he starts looking around.

He stood there confused and a horrified as he sees two man on a double bike riding by. They had black diving suits on them and lights. There were also some sort of light balls on their heads. Then he sees a homeless man pushing a cart. Inside the cart he could see some sort of a creature, half robot half spider with big yellow glowing eyes.

A mailman passes him. He looks after him, only to see a tail peeping out of his shorts. And then he looks up at the stars. They shined brighter than ever. Too bright for the city.

He hears a scuffle back inside the store. Sam he thought. He runs back inside. A creature with small yellow spikes was holding Sam up in the air, twisting his back. Dean shoots it with the laser gun saying "Man, you look like crap." Another smaller creature runs to him. His body and head looked like a giant scoop of poop. Dean shoots him two saying "I take that back. YOU look like crap."

A tall black man with weird jaw line and a hat on his head hits him, making him drop the gun. Sam shouts at him "Hit him in the eye." Dean hits the man eyes with his fingers, and the man punches him back. Sam shouts still on the ground "No, his third eye." Dean looks at him confused for a second and then takes the black man's hat off revealing a third eye. The pokes it and the man drops.

A creature in a long coat and a bandana, looking like he came out of a cowboy movie charges him. Dean tries to kick him in the nuts. Sam shouts now getting up. "K, he's a ballchinian!"

"A what?" The creature kept laughing at him as he kept trying to kick him. "Ballchinian? Chin? Balls?". He pulls down the creature's bandana revealing testicles. Dean was grossed out by this. He pick up a pipe he found laying around and hits the creature in the... chin.

After he took out all the creatures Dean looks at Sam "Sam, what the hell?"

Sam looks at him frowning "Sam? Who's Sam? K, it's me J."

"J?"

"Yeah, your old partner, J. You still don't remember?" Then Dean catches his reflection in a mirror on the wall. His eyes widen in shock. The man looking back at him was no other than Tommy Lee Jones.


	2. Chapter 2

"What the hell happened to my face?" Dean shouts at his reflection in the mirror. Sam replies "Well, you did age a bit since I last saw you, man."

"Man? Are you calling me old?"

Sam puts his hands in the air, shaking his head "Nope, not at all."

And then Dean had a thought. He walks to the left still looking at the mirror. In the place where Sam stood, the was a tall black man. Will Smith? No way! What the hell is going on here? Who is doing this?

Dean starts going through his pockets again looking for a hex bag. They did just kill a witch; maybe she planted a hex bag on them. Since he finds nothing but a picture of a man pointing at the sky, he goes and tries to search Sam's pockets.

"Whoa, whoa, what are you doing?"

"Looking for a hex bag."

Sam looks at him confused. "A hex bag? I ain't no witch, man. Look, we don't have time for this. We need to go back to the headquarters and take Selena out."

Dan frowns "Selena?"

"Yes, the Kyloatian bitch. She is here looking for the Light of Zartha. And you are... You were the only one who knew what happened that night when the Zarthains came."

Dean was only half listening. He kept thinking about a way to get out of this. Was it a witch? Could it be a ghost in the TV? Maybe it was Gabriel again messing with them. He had no choice but to follow the movie, hoping he would find some clue who was behind it and how to get out.

"You know what? – Sam continues – Memory or no memory, we still have to stop her. Let's go."

Dean looks at him as Sam was going up the stairs. He thought that that might not be Sam at all, but he wasn't sure. Sam is gonna go charge in there and get himself killed. I can't let that happen. So he follows him.

They both got outside and entered an alley behind the store. Dean's eyes widen in joy as he sees his impala there. "Baby!"

Sam frowns at him "Baby? Ough, you mean the car." He takes out a remote out of his pocket and clicks it. Baby lets out a tone, making Dean frown. He goes up to the driver's door.

Sam stops him "Wait, what'cha doing?"

"I always drive." Dean replies.

"No, no, whoa, whoa, what'cha used to do is drive that old busted joint. I drive the new hotness."

The new hotness? Dean thought.

Sam points at Dean saying "Old and busted." And then points to himself "New and hotness."

Dean just kept staring at him. He didn't know whether to laugh or punch him. So he kept staring at him. Sam pushes the button on the remote making the car let out another tone and hands over the remote to Dean. Dean takes it and Sam goes around to sit in the passenger seat saying "Old busted hotness."

As they drove, Sam says "Selena thinks you know where the light is. She broke into MIB trying to find ya. So, fastest back to MIB is the next right on 39th."

Dean doesn't take it.

Sam continues "Ok, next right on 37th. Right here... 37!... Right..."

But Dean missed that turn too. "We are not going there."

"Headquarters has been breached, man. We need to go in, and peal some caps and bust some wigs up in that joint!" Dean looks at Sam amazed at his dialect. He was weirded out by it, but still felt like laughing.

"We are not ready." Dean replies.

Sam continues "Look, I understand you've been out a long time and I get that'cha little scared. I'm a keep it real with'cha, I'm a little scared too."

Dean looks at him frowning "I'm not scared."

Sam replies "Me neither. I just thought we was bonding."

Dean frowns at him even more. But ignores what he says and carries on "This Selena chick broke into your...um...MIB, because she thinks I know where this light thing is, in order to lure me back..."

"...Into a trap." Sam says nodding. "Which is exactly why we don't need to be just bustin' in there, man, we gotta have a plan. Where are we going, scene of the crime?"

"You're the boss." Dean replies.

"Yeah, yeah, scene of the crime. That's a left dough."

They arrive at a pizza place called Ben's Pizza. Just as they walk out of the car Dean noticed something strange. A strange flower growing out of the sewer bars.

He walk over to it a kicks it slightly with his hand. "What's this? Hey?" He asks.

Sam's eyes widen, he felt a bit scared. He walks to the flower and leans down "Hey, Jeff, what's happening buddy? We were just wondering what you were doing here?"

Dean kicks it again, making Sam frown at him. He continues "You know our arrangements, Jeff; you don't travel outside the E, F and R subway lines and in exchange you get to eat all the in organic garbage that you want."

Dean was getting tired of this. He grips the flower with his hand, trying to rip it out. But the sewer bars start shaking. Sam was clearly freaking out shouting "Excuse my partner, he, he is new and..."

A giant worm comes crashing through the bars, ripping them and some asphalt out. Sam looks up at the 600 foot tall worm and Dean still clinching to the flower on worms head and finishes "...kinda stupid. Woo, Jeff, you got big. What'cha been eating?"

The worm rushes back down. "Jeffry, put my partner down!" But Sam could clearly see the worm had no intension on stopping. So he pulls out his hand and catches on the worm as they all disappear in the subway tunnels.


	3. Chapter 3

As the worm dragged them in the subway tunnels and makes one jump, Dean looses the grip on the flower and the jump flips him, making him land in front of Sam, on the worm's neck.

Sam shouts "Watch out!" But Dean was too slow. He hits his head on a metal banner with a Danger Low Point sign on it. He shouts "Augh! – and then realizes – are we riding a giant worm?!"

"Yep! Sam replies trying to get a needle and a syringe out of his pocket. Dean was next to notice a traffic light hanging, coming at them fast. He shouts "Duck!" And they both dodge it. Sam finally gets out the syringe and shouts at Dean "Help me out!"

Dean looks at him and sees him trying to put a vial in the syringe. Dean takes the vial as Sam shouts again "Get down!" They both miss another banner. Dean places the vial in the syringe Sam was holding and Sam stabs the worm with it saying "Sweet dreams!"

The worm lets out a groan, but still kept going. Sam sighs in anger and says "Damn expiration date!"

He takes out another vial and tries to put it in. Dean tries to help, but they both get hit by another banner, Sam stabbing Dean with the empty syringe.

The worm kept rushing through the tunnels and just as Sam made a new shot in the syringe, the worm jumps again sending the boys flying into a back of a subway train, smashing the back window.

People in the train look at them for a second, then continue as if nothing happened. Dean was confused at this, but Sam pulled out a card out of his pocket shouting "Transit authority people. Please move to the forward car, we have a bug in the electrical system!" But nobody moved. Dean frowns at the whole situation. "Hey! – he yells – WE GOT A BUG IN THE ELECTRICAL..." but before he could finish that Jeff takes a big bite of the back of the car. Everyone screamed and started running away from the worm. Sam comments "Ough, now ya'll runnin'."

"No, no, sit down, sit down. It is only a 600 foot worm!" He says as they follow the people to the front car.

"Everybody out before I start knocking heads here!" The drunk train conductor says as they all piled up by his door. Sam walks up to the guy and says "You go in there and you put the hammer down on this thing."

The conductor replies "I am Captain Larry Bridgewater, and I decide what happens on this train."

Dean was getting pissed. He pulls out the conductor from the crowd and shows him the big worm that has now ate most of the train. "Come here. Larry? Yeah. Meet our friend Jeff."

The conductor in shock lets out "Larry just made a decision." Sam adds "Yeah, Larry needs to take his ass in there." Larry runs to his control cubical.

Sam and Dean make their way back to Jeff. Dean asks "Now what do we do?"

But Sam didn't respond. Instead he just pulled out his laser gun and pointed it at Jeff's open mouth. He shouts "Don't make me do this, Jeff!"

Jeff groans at him once more and closes his mouth, slowing down.

"Don't make me do this!? You serious!? You should have shot the son of a bitch." Dean was pissed. It was their job to kill the monsters, whether they are alien or not. Especially the ones that try to eat a whole train.

Sam just glances at him as the train pulls to a station and stops. He and Dean walk out first. He turns to the crowd. "Just a second." He pulls out his black sunglasses and puts them on. He looks at Dean frowning, signalling him to do the same. He takes out the neutralizer and flashes them all.

"The city of New York would like to thank you for participating in our drill."

"Yeah – Dean adds – if this was an actual emergency you all would've been eaten! Because you don't listen. When a man comes bashing through the back of the subway..."

Sam nudges him and flashes the crowd again. "Thank you for participating in our drill. Hopefully you have enjoyed our small, more efficient subway cars. Watch your step and ya'll have a nice evening."

They get out the subway and start walking their way to the pizza place. Dean asks "Why not just kill him?"

"K, I know you don't remember, but it ain't our job to kill the aliens. It\s our job to secure the public and the aliens. Some of them have lost their homes and are just looking for a safe place here on Earth. We make that happen."

"So, you don't kill any of them?"

"Well... If there are really evil ones. Like wanting to destroy the planet and shit, and if we can't take'em in, we take'em out."

"Right, right..." Dean starts remembering some parts of the original movie. He really hasn't seen it all, just bits and pieces here and there. His head starts hurting and so does his stomach.

"I'm hungry." Dean says.

Sam rolls his eyes. "Wait, wait, don't tell me, you want pie."

Dean was confused. He didn't think this was actually Sam in front of him, but then... How could he know I like pie?

Sam continues "I know, I know, your granddaddy always said if you got a problem you can't solve, pie helps you get out of your head. You know what? It might be time we do something stupid. Let's drop it all and have some pie! Ok, now I want some pie! I want me some pie. Let's go get some dumb ass pie!"

Dean stood there amazed as Sam crossed the street and entered a diner. K also likes pies. But what crawled up Sam's ass?

They both take a seat at the counter. Sam says "There is a chick out there who wants to end the world, and we are sitting here having pie." His voice was filled with sarcasm and anger.

There order was shortly delivered. Dean dug in, feeling as he was eating the cherry pie for the first time. Sam looks at him and shakes his head. And then Sam's eyes get a sparkle, his mouth widens into the biggest smile Dean has ever seen. He turns around and sees a girl waving at them. Sam, you old dog.


	4. Chapter 4

Sam waves back and signals her to join them. "Laura, this is...um... my partner, Agent K. K this is Laura Vasquez. She is the witness that saw Selena."

Dean checks her out thinking Not bad, Sammy, not bad at all. And then he looks at Sam "Witness?"

"Yeah, I know we are supposed to neutralize any witnesses, but she might be important to me...To us... For the investigation. Laura, tell K what you saw." Dean could see Sam was getting a bit uncomfortable.

Laura smiles shyly "There was a two headed guy and a woman in leather. She had tentacles coming out of her hand and she used them to rip the skin of Ben's body." She says looking down. Dean could see this Ben guy meant something to her.

She continues as Sam orders her some pie as well. "They kept asking Ben about some light. Light of Zartha, something like that."

Dean asks "So, was Ben an alien?" Sam nods. "Maybe there is a clue about this light in the pizza place?"

"Yeah, we were headed there when you'ad to stop and smell the flower." Sam says referring to the flower on Jeff's head. Dean gives him a look, rolls his eyes and finishes his pie. "Ok, let's go."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

As all three reached to pizza place, the impala was still there. But there was loud music coming from it.

"Who let the dogs out? Woof? Woof?"

"What the hell?" Dean asks as he approaches the car. His eyes widen when he sees a dog in there singing to the song and barking. Sam comes over and peeps inside "Frank? What'cha doing?!" he asks frowning at the dog. The dog replies "Just relaxing a bit. Hey K, good to see you again!"

Dean points at himself "Me?"

Sam sighs "K is still neutral. The headquarters are..."

"...Under attack, I know. I snuck out and went to find you. Well, hello, momma." The dog says, now seeing Laura.

Sam gets pissed and gets in the car. He turns down the music and picks the dog up. "Hey, I don't like to be man handled!" Frank says.

Sam pulls him out of the car and sets him down saying "Stay!" Then he turns and heads inside the pizza place. Dean and Laura follow.

"So, the Zarthan Ben was vaporised here, facing this direction. So I'm assuming that the perp was over here..." Sam says pointing around the place. As he pointed to the place the perp was standing, Dean notices something. A picture on the wall of Ben holding a big fish, blue sky behind him. He interrupts Sam as he goes over to it and examines it. Sam joins him saying "That is one hell of a fish!"

Dean frowns as he takes out a picture out of his pocket. The sky looked the same. He places his picture on the one hanging up. Now it looked like Ben was standing next to him, to the movie version of him. Agent K was pointing at something. Sam says "Man, you left yourself clues."

Dean says "Must have. Look, I am pointing at something." He examines the way he is pointing by leaning up against the wall, the picture by his head. Sam tries to get his attention "K?"

"The astronaut!" he says pointing at another picture on the wall. He goes over to it and again leans against the wall "Ok, he is pointing at the... at the... Pizza boxes."

Across the room pizza boxes were stacked. They had a sign Ben's Pizza and a slice of pizza on them. Dean hits the boxes, touching the pizza slice on them and says "It's an arrow." He follows where the slices point to.

Sam tried again "K, wait."

Dean says imitating the real agent K "You're slowing me down, slik. What we are looking for is in these cabinets right here." He opens it, and takes a can out of it. He turns it around and says with a serious look on his face "Anchovy fillets in virgin olive oil!"

At least he finally turned to Sam. Sam was pointing at a key hanging on the wall, right next to K and Ben's picture. He picks up the keys saying "I really hope I ain't slowing you down, slik." Dean felt a bit embarrassed.

Sam turns to Laura. "You can't stay here. They might come back. You can stay with some friends of mine." Laura nods.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Sam, Dean and Laura get to an apartment near the pizza place. As Sam enters he hits his head on the suspended sealing. He ducks down and so does Laura as she enters. The room was full of little strange creatures. They had a face like a catfish, two normal-length arms with only three fingers on them and four more arms coming out of their stomach.

One was reading a newspaper, another one at the bar, smoking. Third one was in a Jacuzzi. Two more were on a training machine, trying to work on their muscles.

"J! What's going on, man?" they all shout at the same time.

Sam replies "Hey, what's happening fellas? MIB is code 101."

"Woo, very bad. Very very bad." They reply and Sam continues "Listen, I need your help. This is Laura."

"Ough, Laura..." the creatures shout liking the girl.

"Hey, easy, easy!" Sam shouts back

Laura's eyes widen looking at them "They are worms?"

"Once you go worm, that's what you'll yearn!" the worms shout in unison.

Sam smiles awkwardly "Yeah, that's what they say. – he turns to Laura – they just..." and gestures with his hand that they keep blabbing.

Laura shakes off her hand saying "Ough, I've dated worse."

Dean comes in, frowning at the creatures. The worms shout to him "K, you're back!"

One worm says "Somebody said you were dead!" Another one adds "You look good."

Dean felt awkward and uncomfortable. "We should go." He says to Sam. As he was about to exit he hears Sam telling the worms "Laura is very important to me... " Dean gives him a look "...To us. To the stuff, man. To the stuff we're doin'."

Dean exits the room and Sam turns to the worms "I need you guys to keep an eye on her for me."

Sam turns to Laura and hands her something "My communicator, in case you need it."

Laura leans over and kisses Sam making the worms go "Oooouuuuu..."

Sam was a bit surprised, but pleasantly and only lets out "Ok..." He turns and exits the room.

Laura looks after him as he left then turns to the worms. One of them was holding a game. They all shout "Twister!"


	5. Chapter 5

Sam and Dean are in the hallways of the worms apartment, walking out. Dean says "You sure this key opens a locker at the Grand Central?"

"Yes, the numbers match. Since you obviously left yourself clues, I suppose when we open the locker, we'll find another clue. You sure like to keep you enemies confused."

Dean replies "I'm confused."

They reach Grand Central station and the lockers. Dean approaches the locker nervously. What the hell are we gonna find here? He stood there in front of the locker, not sure he wanted to know. Sam says "C'mon, man, open the damn locker."

Dean slowly puts the key in and turns it. Sam frowns and yanks the door open. He was amazed at what he saw.

Inside was a whole village of little wookie-like creatures (wookie – StarWars reference), except they were chubbier and had glowing antennas on their head. They all turn to him shouting in unison "K! He's back! The light giver! All hail K! All hail K!... – and they start chanting –

Ough K can't you see, by the... "

Sam looks at Dean "You would be man who would be the King of the train locker."

Dean ignores him and interrupts the singing "Um...Guys...Did I leave anything here?"

They shout "Yes, the time keeper. You left it here to illuminate our streets and our hearts – they point at a tower in their village that held a wristwatch. Dean takes it – Ough, merciful one, the clock tower, the clock tower!" They were clearly upset with Dean taking the watch. Sam comforts them "Relax, relax, I got'cha! Here, check this out! Titanium case, waterproof for over 300 meters..." he says taking his watch off and putting it on their clock tower.

One of the wookies asks "Who are you, stranger?"

Sam looks at them confused by the question "J." He answers.

Again in unison the wookies go "Hm... J! All hail J! All hail J!..." and they break into song again. Dean smiles "Now you're the king!" and goes to close the locker when they shout "Wait! The tablet! The tablet!"

Dean opens it up again looking around. They were pointing at a video rental member's card they put up as a billboard.

One elderly looking wookie step on a platform of some sorts and says "We have lived by it's word, and peace has reign throughout our world. Pass it on to others so that they too can be enlightened!"

"Be kind, rewind!" the wookies say in unison.

"Go back and reconcile your past in order to move tranquilly into your future!" the elder wookie says.

"Two for one every Wednesday!"

"Give twice as much as yee receive on the most sacred of days, every Wednesday!"

" Adult section in the back! Yeah!" and they all rush to a cabin with a neon sign on it that said XXX Girls

Dean rolls his eyes, takes the card and closes the locker. Sam made a remark "That's just nasty!"

They were walking out of the train station when Sam asks "What's up with the video card?"

"I don't know." Dean replies.

"Why'd you leave the watch?"

"I don't know! I guess we have till midnight to figure it out." He says showing Sam the watch that was on a timer. "We have 59 minutes."

Next stop was the video club. The impala pulls over in front of it. Sam says getting in the club "Alright, look. I have an idea. How 'bout we stop chasing all these busted ass backwards clues, get ourselves some vision-carbonizers and get our headquarters back."

Dean sighs Can't believe I'm saying this "We need to be smart about this, Sa..J. Selena's luring us into a trap and we don't even know what it is she wants. I will make sense, I promise."

They get up to the counter with a chick with piercings and black-green hair. Dean asks her "Is this card valid?"

She looks at it saying "This card hasn't been used in years, before I was born." Dean frowns at this remark, but smiles back at the girl. "I've been away on business."

Sam adds "A lot of frequent flyer miles." Making Dean frown again.

The chick says "You should use them. And go to Cambodia. I hear you can get a lobster for like a dollar."

Dean asks "Can you tell us anything about the account?"

She hit the keyboard a few times looking at the monitor and answers "Only that you never check out a tape. You reserved one once, but you never picked it up."

She turns to the entrance to a back room shouting "Hey, Newton!"

A geeky looking bald guy with thick glasses walks out zipping up his zipper. He says "We have a huge rat, staked up the toilet. So you're gonna have to pee in the sink..." Then he notices the agents. He turns to the chick smirking "Still think I'm paranoiod?" She looks back saying "Yeah."'

He turns to the agents "Gentlemen, my name is Newton, I run the place. Seen any aliens lately?"

Sam says "Man, you need professional help."

"He's getting it, it's not working." The chick replies and Newton continues "Ok, so new case, huh? Episode 27, Light of Zartha. Got it." Sam and Dean exchange looks.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

Upstairs in Newton's house, he set up the DVD player as his mother shouts for downstairs. "Newton? Newton? Is that you?"

"Yes, ma, I'm up here with some friends."

"Would you like some mini pizzas?"

He turns to the agents "You guys want some mini pizzas? They're good. Like mini bagels with pizza stuff on them. Her hands shake so she ends up putting a lot of cheese on it."

Dean wanted the mini pizzas, but Sam waves his hand off. Newton shouts back to his mother "No, thanks, we're cool."

He goes over to the DVD player and hits play. Sam says sarcastically "Finally, some hard evidence."

A sign appears on the TV Mysteries in History andan elderly man comes on and starts

"1978 The devastating war of Zartha has raged for over 50 years. But the Zarthans had a great treasure, the light of Zartha. A source of power so awesome it alone could mean victory and the restoration of Zartha, or complete annihilation if it fell into the hands of the Kyloathians. A group of Zarthans made the journey, led by the keeper of the light – princess Lorana. Lorana beseeched the Men in Black to help her hide the light on Earth. But they could not intervene."

The video shows the leader of Men In Black sending a spaceship with supposed light into outer space. Selena portrayed as a pile of snakes screams "NO!" and she picks up a proton gun and fires. The laser hits princess Lorana and she dies. The leader of the Men in Black leaned over her, sad, and held a bracelet in his hands, that was the only thing left of the princess.

"Woo, Woo, wait. I've seen that braclet!" Sam shouts. "Laura has one just like it. You never sent it of the planet. You hid it here."

Dean nods and says "The worm guys."


	6. Chapter 6

Sam nods in the direction of Newton and the chick signalling Dean to flash them as he goes down to flash his mother. Dean could hear the mother asking Sam "Are you one of Newton's friends from therapy?" and then she was silent.

Dean flashes Newton and the girl "Ok, you. First get some contact lenses because those look like they can pick up cable. Second, get her to Cambodia, get her a lobster dinner, and pay more than a dollar. Third, when you come back, move your ass out of your mom's house..." He was about to say more, but could hear Sam calling him "Agent K!?"

"Alright! – he shouts – and there are no such things a aliens." He finishes the brainwashing procedure.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

In the impala Sam talks into his communicator "Comunicator, call J." Laura picks up "Laura, it's me."

Laura replies "Hey! We're playing Twister."

The worms shout "Hey,J! What's up,J?!"

Laura continues laughing "They are very good at this. They don't have any spines. Ough, they were telling me about Oprah. From Chicago... "

The worms shout out again "Yeah, maybe landed in Chicago!" Laura continues laughing.

Sam asks "Are you wearing a bracelet?"

"Yeah!"

"Is it glowing?"

"It has never done that before." She says with seriousness in her tone.

"We are on our way!"

But what Dean and Sam didn't know was that Selena was listening in to the conversation. She has been monitoring all communications from the headquarters.

Dean looks at Sam "You care about Laura?"

Sam shakes his head "C'mon, K..."

Dean interrupts "That's why you didn't neural... flash her."

"Yeah, I got a bit emotionally involved, so what? It is just like you did with Lorana."

Dean frowns thinking that was the thing that got the real agents J and K in this mess.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

When Sam and Dean got back to the apartment, all that was left were some messed up, split in half worms and a big mess. But the worms were putting themselves back together slowly. One of them comments "That's gonna leave a scar."

Sam frowns and then shakes his head. "Ough, boy... Where is Laura?"

"MIB headquarters. Some dumb, big, two headed guy..."

Dean says looking at his watch "They've got the bracelet. We got 39 minutes."

And then he remembers what the timer was. He remembers in the movie it was the time they had left to send the light out of Earth, or it will destroy it. Dean felt compelled to stop this from happening, to save the world if he could. He had completely forgotten he was supposed to try and get back to his reality, to his real Sam and to their life. This mission they were on, this hunt, completely consumed him.

He turns to exit the apartment. Sam takes one last look at the worms saying "Danm...You guys pull yourself together."

The worms slowly follow them shouting "Wait up!"

Sam and Dean headed out, worms following. Sam asks "She's got the bracelet, why does she want Laura?"

"She also wants me." Dean replies.

"So, what do we do?"

"I say we split some wigs." Dean answers trying to be a bit funny. Sam looks at him saying "We need some wig splitting weapons."

Dean remembers this part of the movie. He smiles saying "Got them."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

They enter an apartment. A family inside, a father, mother and a daughter were sitting on a sofa, watching TV. They look at them covnfused. Dean says "Don't worry folks, used to live here, came by to pick up a couple of things." He smiled at himself as he sounded just like K. Sam also smiled at him "You startin' to remember?"

Dean just shrugs his shoulders and turns the thermometer on the wall counter clockwise, then clockwise then back again.

The wall behind the sofa raises up, revealing a whole room filled with weapons. One of the worms makes a comment "Nice place."

The family looked at them baffled as Dean tosses the worms some smaller proton guns thinking I would never do this in real life

Sam picks up a big gun and so does Dean and they leave the room. Dean goes back to the thermometer as Sam flashes the family. Dean says "You didn't see a room full of weapons. You didn't see four alien night crawlers. You will love and cherish each other for the rest of your lives."

Sam adds as he was leaving the room "And she – pointing at the kid – gets to stay up late and get lots of cookies and candy and cakes and junk and stuff..."

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

The impala pull up to the MIB headquarters. Sam, Dean and the worms get out with their weapons. Sam asks them "You ready guys?"

"Lock and load." The worms reply.

Sam turns on his weapon. It made a charging sound. Sam points it at the building. Dean looks at him and asks "Are you sure you know what you're doing?"

Sam nods "Yep. I'm about to attack one of the most feared aliens in the universe with four worms and a mailman." Dean frowns Mailman? He forgot when K was neutralized he started working at the postal office. But he did remember something else. He tries to stop Sam.

"Wait!"

"Let's make it hot!" Sam says and fires. The front door explodes making a vacuum and pulls them in. Them and the worms and a hot dog cart that was in front. They all come tumbling in, hot dogs flying everywhere.

Dean gets up and so does Sam. Sam shouts at Dean "I know, I know, the lockdown. The building is under pressure. Nothing in, nothing out. I knew that."

They enter the elevator and Dean shouts to the worms "Worms, front and centre." And they come in too.

'Front and centre? Why did I say that? I am really starting to sound like K.' Dean was a bit weirded out. 'Wait! I know this part. The robot!'


	7. Chapter 7

As the elevator doors open, a robot that looked like garbage can slowly comes to the door. It transforms itself into a full-on destructive machine, pulling out guns everywhere. It starts shooting, spinning in every direction. Soon the whole elevator was filled with bullet holes equally dispersed. But there was seemingly no one in the elevator.

Sam and Dean and the worms were stretched over the ceiling of the elevator. They could hear Selena "Ough, yummy. Someone I need to eat."

Dean turns to Sam. "Get to the launch panel on the roof. The bracelet shows the departure point. And whatever you do, do not come back for me. That's an order." An order? Now I sound just like Dad.

Sam sighs but nods. He turns to the worms "Guys, give me some cover fire."

The worms were shaking. One of them said "Too scared. Can't move." Sam and Dean exchange looks and sigh.

Sam jumps down and Dean drops hanging upside down and covers Sam firing at the robot. The robot takes the hits and get moved back by the force of the hits. This gave Sam an opportunity to get out of the elevator and run off.

Dean kept shooting at the robot until he had no more bullets. He drops the guns and swings his way back to the ceiling. Wow he thinks. The worms were impressed too. One of them said. "K, my man." Another one added "So flexible."

Dean turns to the worms. "Go to the control panel and shut down all the power to the large pads so that they can't take off." Where are these lines coming from?

The worms were still shaking "Can't! Too scared!"

Dean punches through a panel in the ceiling opening up the escape hatch. The worms smile "Ough, that way. Away from the bullets. No problemo. "

As they go up the escape hatch each lets out a sound "Ougha!" "Wowie." "Iha.." "Yeepee."

The robot makes his way inside the elevator. Dean felt like he was losing control over his body. Unwillingly he pulls out a grenade out of his pocket and throws it hitting the elevator button labelled DOWN.

Dean swings out of the elevator and lands on his feet as the elevator door closes. An explosion inside was heard and smoke came out. Dean could feel getting the control back. Wow, what a rush. But what the hell is going on? Who is controlling me?

He turns and faces Selena. She says pulling out snakes out of her fingers "Nice to see you again, K." The snakes wrap themselves around his whole body. And then everything went black.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

A few moments later he was standing in front of what looked like a spaceship with Laura in it. They were now in a room that looked like a spaceship repair and had launch pads. Laura shouts at him "J!"

J? Wasn't I K?

Dean could hear the computer say 3 minutes to launch! A tall man comes up to him. He had a long black coat on him, his waist and legs wide. The coat looked like it was in a shape of a dress. The man was half bold, half long red hair, a short red beard and a huge nose.

"Hello, J! Long time." The man says to him.

Dean frowns not knowing who that was, but he starts talking "Jarra! Whass up, man? You lookin' great. What's it been, five years?" What the hell?

"And 42 days." Jarra says smiling. "All thanks to you. You count every one of them when you're locked away like a primate."

Locked away? Primate? Shit, this guy is an alien. "You shouldn't have been tryin' to steal our ozone." Steal ozone? What the hell? Dean says and looks at Laura "I'll be there in one minute, sweetie." Sweetie?

Again he loses control over his body. He raises his gun at Jarra. Jarra drops the coat revealing underneath he had no legs but a flying panel with controls and robotic arms on it. And there was no more just one Jarra. There were three smaller ones also on the panels. Jarra says "Over our dead titanium bodies!"

Dean looks at Laura "Two minutes."

One Jarra charges and takes away his gun. Second one flies by and hits him in the face. Third one flies by and hits him in the crotch and flies away laughing.

Then all three come charging at him at once. He dodges two, but the third one flies low, hits and pulls his leg, sending Dean on his ass.

Round two. Again they come charging, big Jarra hoovering in front of Laura, laughing. Dean gets up and rushes to them. He steps on one, and then the other as if he was climbing stairs. After he stomped on the second one, he makes a jump at the big Jarra, but a third one grabs him by the hand and flies him over to a wall. Two minutes to launch! A computer voice lets out.

Dean gets up again, still not in control of his own body. He staggers around and falls over some spare parts of a spaceship. He gets up again, picking up a pipe of some sorts.

Laura shouts at him "Just go, I'll be fine!"

Dean replies "What'cha talking about, girl, I'm winning!" I am?

Dean walks over to the four hoovering Jarras. "Jarra, you're under arrest for being that ugly and for making that many copies." Copies? Does that mean if I take out the big guy the rest go Poof?

Big Jarra shouts "I want him in pieces."

Round three. And Dean is in control again, at least of his body. One Jarra charges at him, but Dean was faster. He swings the pipe as a baseball bat and sends him flying. He shouts "Hell yeah!" The Jarra crashes at a wall and explodes. But a second one grabs Dean by the collar and by the pipe. He lifts him high and drops him, right at the end of a pile of some plastic tubes, also spaceship parts. Dean gets up again.

Round four. Big Jarra was pissed. He runs to him and Dean runs as well. As he gets to him, he makes a jump, clinging on to Jarra as they spin flying in the air. They fly around the room, Dean behing him now, trying to choke him. A small Jara comes running to help, but Dean punches him, sending him flying off into a spaceship. The little Jarra hit the hard surface and explodes. "Aha! Down to one now!" Dean laughs at Jarra.

The third one also comes flying towards them. Then Dean get a though. He covers big Jarra's eyes and pulls out a handle on his controls which obviously held him connected to the hoovering pad. As the pad starts to fall, big Jarra and small Jarra crash into each other, going up in a big bang.

Dean drops on the same pile of plasitic tubes.

30 seconds to launch.

Dean struggles to get out of the tubes. He tries and he tries and eventually gets on his back.

20 seconds to launch.

He sighs and starts thrusting his hips up and down, bouncing on the pile. Finally, he gets out and gets up.

10 seconds to launch.

As the computer started the countdown from 10, he walks over to Laura, pushing the big red button, stoping the launch at 3 seconds.


	8. Chapter 8

Dean was in K's body again. What the...? He wanted to shout out Who is doing this? But he had no control. It was as if he was watching it all happen from different points of view.

Snakes were all over him, tying him and suspending him on a pillar in the MIB headquarters main hall. Selena was in front of him. "You've lost you insignificant spec. You have wasted 25 years of my time and for what? The complete and total annihilation of Zartha. All because you went mushy."

Dean looks at her. He had to admit she did look hot. Except the snakes out of fingers part. He replies unwillingly "I'm gonna give you one last chance to surrender you slimy Kyloathian bitch."

She smirks "What are you gonna do to, stop me?"

"Not me, him." He looks over Selena. Selena turns and faces Sam and a proton gun in her face.

"Your flight has been cancelled." Sam says and shoot her. Selena and her snakes disintegrate, and Dean drops down. And then everything goes black again.

Dean thought No, not again but then the emergency lights went on. He was still K.

Sam shouts throughout the headquarters "Worms!" as if he was calling them. They hear a "Sorry!"

Sam presses his remote making the impala come inside into the main hall. Cool! Dean thought and wanted to smile. But there was nothing but a blank face on K.

Sam opens the car's door. "Gimme the bracelet." He says to Laura.

"I'm coming with." She replies.

"Please, gimme the bracelet."

Dean interrupts "Everybody, get in the car." He sits in the driver's seat.

And they take off, not noticing a piece of a snake on the floor.

Laura was sitting in the back. She looks at her bracelet. It was a chain with pendants on it. There was a pyramid, an atom, the London eye, the Eiffel tower. But the pyramid was the one glowing. She says "I can't believe this charm bracelet was what everybody was after."

Sam replies "Yeah, you'd be surprised how often is something as small as that."

Dean thought Ough, no!. His thought had a sad tone. Dean remembered this part of the movie. But all that came out of his mouth was: "That's not the light. It tells us the departure point."

Sam frowns "What?"

"If we don't get to that departure point in 11 minutes and 15 seconds, or that bracelet is gonna go nuclear and destroy all life on Earth."

Sam and Laura exclamate at the same time "What?!"

But before Dean could answer, they felt a nudge on the car. They turn to see Selina in one of the MIB vehicles.

Dean goes over to push the big red button on the dash board, but Sam tries to stop him "K, no!"

Dean looks at him and says "I know what I am doing!" No, I don't. What are we doing?

He pushes it and in a few seconds the impala transforms into a flying car with hyper propulsion. And they take off fast, Sam screaming in the passenger seat. As their bodies get accustomed to the speed, they sit upright and Sam says "Modified for hyper-speed!"

Dean replies calmly "Seatbelts." As he puts his on. But Dean was really still screaming inside, feeling the rush.

The steering wheel gets pulled in and a joystick comes out. "What's that?" Dean asks. It's a freaking joystick!

"In hyper-speed you have to use different navigations." Sam replies. "Ok." Dean answers pushing a star button on the joystick. The car flips upside down. Sam and Laura come tumbling down on the roof. Dean hears Sam trying to explain how the joystick works, but he keeps shouting in his head I know how it works! And then he felt he was in control again. At least in his hands. He grabs the joystick and flips the car back around, making Sam land on Laura in the back seat. She tries to tell Sam "I just want you to know..." but he interrupts her "Hold that thought for me for one second."

Sam gets back to the passenger seat as the car takes yet another hit from Selena. "Computer, worms." He says to the communicator.

The line opens up and they could hear Frank the dog on the other side going on about a date he had.

"Frank, you there?" Sam says.

"Ok, we lost control, taking fire. K pushed the red button." Sam looks at Dean frowning. At that second Dean couldn't help but wonder if Sam was stuck inside like he was. What am I gonna do?

Sam continues "The main computer at MIB can lock down on Selena and destroy her vehicle. I need you to... Frank? Frank?" But the line got cut off. Dean could feel losing control again. NO!

Dean or rather K says "Aha! Here we go, the autopilot!" He pushes the button and a man pops up in his lap. Dean leans over to Sam and mutters "It is not automatic piloting!" Idiot! Why not let me drive?!

Sam rolls his eyes "He doesn't operate at hyper-speed."

"I could really use a steering wheel!"

Sam was getting pissed. "We don't have no damn steering wheel. Tis what we got!" and he shuts down the autopilot.

"Didn't your momma ever give you a gameboy when you was a kid?"

"What is a gameboy?!"

Now Sam was really pissed. He points at Dean and shouts "You know what!? Move! Move!"

They awkwardly exchange places and Sam takes the joystick. They get more hits. Sam looks around and then says "Ok, straight down". The flying impala takes a dive into the subway and Selena follows.

As they rush through the tunnels, the impala takes heavy fire. Dean sighs and says "The subway might not be the best place to loose her." But Sam shoo shed him.

"Where is he?" Sam asks

"Who?" Dean asks.

Infront of them a giant worm appears, the one with the flower on his head.

"Jeff." Sam says and pulls a lever.

The car drops to the ground and Selena passes over them, straight into Jeff's mouth.


	9. Chapter 9

The impala lands on a top of a building. The building had a big pyramid shaped roof window on it. Next to it was a small garden with a big rock in its centre.

They all get out of the car. Sam approaches Dean and asks "We're running out of time, K! Where is the light?"

Inside Dean sighs. He knew. And he couldn't bear to look in Sam's eyes and tell him. But K turns to Sam, and points at Laura. "Right here."

Laura smiles "What? I am the light? No, no way!"

Dean smiles at her "You have a planet to save Laura." Damn it!

But Laura was still in denial "You have me confused with someone else. I work part time in a pizza place."

"Two days ago I was running a post office. You are who you are. Laura, you are the light. The leader of your people. Their spirit and their hope. The power is within you to save the planet."

Laura shakes her head, but Dean continues "You are going to save the world. You know things before they happen."

She fights back "I'm a Libra."

"You're a Zarthain! When you're sad, it always seems to rain."

"Lots of people get sad when it rains."

"It rains because you're sad."

And then the biggest star in the sky starts shining. It shines upon the rock in the garden transforming it into a small spaceship. Sam leans on the car. He was clearly sad and disappointed. Laura and Dean exchange looks and then she looks at Sam.

They stood there staring at each other until Laura finally says "It's not fair."

Sam smiles just a bit "It never is."

God damn, it really never is.

Dean says to Laura "We are who we are. Even if we sometimes forget."

But then Jeff pops out, smashing the pyramid window. He growls t them showing his teeth. Sam shouts at him "I am so not in the mood for you now, Jeff! Get back into the subway!"

And then Jeff starts coughing. It looked as though something was coming up his throat, like he was going to vomit. Instead, he explodes into million pieces revealing inside a giant worm-like man-eating plant that was Selena.

This is not good. Dean grabs Laura saying "That's not good." And tries to get her to the spaceship.

Selena opens her big mouth shooting snake-like vines. Sam shouts "NO!" as the vines go after Dean and Laura. He jump in front and the vines grab him. Every fibber of Dean's being wanted to jump and grab Sam, help his brother. But instead he turns to Laura "I cannot emphasise strongly enough how much we need you on that transport, princess." Dean takes a gun out of his pocket and calmingly starts shooting at Selena, who was dangling his brother around, smashing him into walls.

Sam shouts "Laura, you have to go!"

Dean runs out of ammo. Still very calm he says to Laura "Go. He's fine. He does this all the time."

Sam was struggling with snake-vines trying to hit them and trying not to get bitten. "Got the last smack down on your candy ass." He says hitting two vines and binding them together in a knot.

"Laura, it's your destiny!" Destiny my ass!

Dean takes out another gun and again calmingly shoots at Selena. Sam grabs a vine that tried to bite him "Hey, no biting!", but the vine kept trying. So Sam grabs it and bites it, taking of its head.

Dean turns to Laura "If you don't go, we all die." She stared at him. "You, know, you're just as beautiful as your mother." Her mother? Princess Lorana? Ough, now I get it.

She turns and enters the spaceship.

Dean turns to Selena shooting her with his gun. Sam screams at him "K! May I suggest a bigger gun?" But Dean kept shooting, hitting all the right places, making Selana go down and release Sam.

Sam just stood there, watching Laura head off in her spaceship. She was sad and crying, so it started to rain.

What was left of Selena's vines jumps up and starts going after Laura. Sam and Dean take out bigger guns out of impala's trunk. Dean says "Kid, thanks for bringing me back." Sam replies "No problem."

"Why didn't you tell me?"

"Would you have let her go?" Son of a bitch!

And they both fire one shot at Selena, making her explode as a large firework.

They stood there watching it for a minute. Sam turns to Dean "So, Laura is Lorana's daughter. Did you..."

Dean interrupts him "MIB is a mess. Let's go."

"Let's go? A thousand people in New York and New Jersey just saw our little event." Sam says, but then notices Dean put on his sunglasses. He looks at him confused but puts his on anyway.

Dean pushes a button on his watch and the Statue of Liberty shines so bright, neutralizing the whole region.

The light was so bright that Dean thought he would go blind even with the glasses on. He screams out of his lungs.

~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~

"K? Dean you K?" Sam stood over him.

Dean opened his eyes.

"Dean, you ok?" Sam asked worried.

Dean jumps up. He looks around seeing the motel room. "What the hell?"

"You were mumbling something all night. But when you started screaming, I had to come wake you up."

"Wake me up?"

"Yes, looked like you were having a nighmare."

"Nightmare... Just a nighmare..." Dean comforts himself.

"What did you dream about?"

Dean looks over at the TV, some commercials were on. "No, nothing. Never mind. Let's pack up and go."

Sam looks at him still with slight worry on his face.

Dean starts packing up. "I'm fine, Sam. It was just a dream. A weird one, but just a dream."

Sam picks up his bag, not saying a word and they all head out. As Dean starts the impala, the radio goes on with a song "Black Suits Comin' (Nod Ya Head)" by Will Smith. Dean frowns at it at turns it off. Sam kept staring at him, wondering what Dean has dreamt about.

Inside their motel room, right under Dean's bed, a bracelet's pyramid pendant starts to glow.

The end

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well, thanks for finding time to read this old one. Not too proud of it, but hey... We all gotta start somewhere and build up, right?


End file.
